Sometimes, the “add to playlist” randomness of my podcast app provides a wonderful walk for my afternoon, and today was one of those days. While my dogs stretch out on the linoleum with their feet out behind them, thumping their tails with post-walkies bliss, let me share a few episodes that rocked my brain recently. It’s Podcast Episode Recommendation time!
First: two from Simplify. This podcast is from the folks who make Blinkist, which are microsummaries, or “blinks,” of popular books. The podcast is consistently interesting and thoughtful, and these two new episodes are kickass.
Emily Nagoski: Pleasure is the Measure features Bitches-fave Emily Nagoski talking about…you guessed it, pleasure and sexuality. You can find this episode on Stitcher, iTunes, or on the Simplify website.
This episode pairs brilliantly with Dr. Emily Brotto: Make Sex More Mindful. Dr. Brotto talks about applying mindfulness techniques to sex and desire, and the identification of desire as an emotion – susceptible to external stimulation and triggers, and not a “drive,” i.e. a predetermined force that happens regardless of stimuli. You can find this episode on Stitcher, iTunes, or on the Simplify website.
THEN another podcast was mentioned in the coda, which I hurriedly bookmarked to listen to in the future: OnBeing: Bessel Van Der Kolk, on How Trauma Lodges in the Body. Van der Kolk’s book,The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, is about how memory is a “sensory experience,” one that doesn’t merely reside in the brain.
Also of note: I also interviewed Emily Nagoski twice for my podcast. In one episode, 186. Come As You Are – Sexuality and Romance: An Interview with Emily Nagoski, PhD, the conversation is an interview. In the second, 201. Cross Stitching and Neuroscience: A Follow Up Interview with Emily Nagoski, she answers listener email, an act of tremendously appreciated generosity.
Then, as I kept walking, since it’s a beautiful day, a new episode of Still Processing queued up, and of course Jenna Wortham and Wesley Morris were talking about sexuality and self love.
In “We Get It On (With Ourselves)” Morris and Wortham talk about the things that bring us pleasure, and the deliberate seeking of pleasure when our daily lives are filled with traumatic news. They also discuss the demise of the Craigslist Personal Ads. Then, there’s this part:
Then we share some our personal tips for maintaining and nurturing that feeling once you find it. Finally we jam out to some of our all-time favorite songs of seduction, from k.d. lang to Beyoncé to Cardi B, and explain why exactly they make us feel the way they do.
As I was writing this, news of the Cosby verdict arrived, so I want to be extra cautious about potential trigger warnings or painful content. Most of these episodes mention sexual trauma or physical trauma to some degree, and they explore scientific and meditative coping mechanisms and dealing with past harm. I don’t want you to feel unsafe, so take care of you, ok?