There’s A Shred Lord Offering Free Metal Riffs in Suburban Yards

Screw your lemonade stands. Seriously. Ten-year-olds selling fifteen-cent cups of over sweetened sugar water under the guise of young entrepreneurial spirit can suck it.

What we want is pure metal riffs. For free. Preferably performed by a shirtless dude wearing a cape. The absolute hero in this recently uploaded YouTube video ticks all the boxes [and licks all the licks] as he doles out free metal to passing traffic and pedestrians like some philanthropic suburban shred lord.

Thanks ‘Internet Guy Performing Free Metal In His Front Yard’ guy, the world loves you.

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